Chapter 34

Chapter 34

Siana instinctively closed her eyes because Alan’s intention became clear to her. She could feel his breath close to her face and then his mouth on hers. He pushed the jam into her mouth. She felt his tongue. Some of the jam fell on their chests.

Siana shivered as the jam trickled down her chest. The sweetness spread in Siana’s mouth and she wanted more. She clung to Alan’s neck and responded to his passionate kiss. The more Alan kissed her, the more the sweetness deepened.

Alan’s kiss became frantic and he grabbed Siana’s breasts. He caressed them and Siana snapped back to reality with the sudden stimulating touch. How is he so good at this? Siana wondered. Even on our first night, he was so good. Has he already done this with other women?

Envy and jealousy rose in Siana’s heart. She knew she was just assuming things but for someone like Alan, it was possible. He was handsome and sweet and strong. Many would have fallen in love with him.Even when they were younger, many girls had eyed him. Many had made advances. Many of Siana’s friends had asked her to be a messenger to convey to Alan that they liked him.

Alan was so experienced in this thing that it seemed possible to Siana that he was probably popular with women even on the battlefield. Perhaps he had many a naïve, young village girls across the country waiting for him. He is so skilled. Maybe he has done it plenty of times with other women. How can someone be so good at this if this was their first time?

Siana was lost in resentful thoughts and jealousy when Alan lowered his head and kissed her at the back of her neck and sank his teeth into it.

“Ah!” screamed Siana at the sharp pain.  “Why did you bite me all of a sudden?”

“It’s a punishment,” said Alan, licking the bitten part to soothe it.

“Punishment?! For what?” asked Siana.

“You were thinking about something else while kissing me,” said Alan.

At the sharp pain, Siana had wrapped her arms around his neck tightly. Siana felt irritated. She was only thinking about him. She wasn’t thinking about anyone else! Even if the thoughts were tinged with jealousy, the subject of her thought was always him.

Alan soothed and kissed the bitten spot. “So, what were you thinking about?” he asked.

“I am not telling you,” said Siana.

With the corners of his eyes slightly curled up, Alan smoothed the bitten spot, and the stickiness smeared with his fingertips as if it were traces of jam.

“So what were you thinking about?”

“I’m not telling you.”

“Then I’ll bite you some more,” he said with a smirk.

“Hey!” said Siana, “You think only you can bite? I can do it too!”

“I don’t think your bite will hurt me much.”

“Don’t look down on me! Do you want to see how much it hurts?”

Alan chuckled. “Not looking down on you,” he said, “It’s just the truth. My neck is not as beautiful and delicate as yours. But I am willing to try. It might tickle.”

“Are you for real?” said Siana, “You are just trying to provoke me.”

“Maybe I am,” he said, smiling, “Tell me what you were thinking about.” He kissed her on the neck again.

Siana jerked with the touch. But she felt too ashamed to voice out what she had thought about. So she didn’t respond.

“You aren’t going to tell me?” he whispered, “Do you want to be punished again?” He licked her neck. Siana felt her thoughts scatter in pleasure. He traced kisses along her neck, then her collarbone, down to her chest. He lowered his head to her breasts and gently bit one of them. He nibbled at it. He licked up the jam that had fallen on her chest earlier. As his tongue teased her breast, Siana trembled and moaned.

“Alan, ahh,” he mumbled, “Stop.”

“Not until you tell me what you were thinking about earlier,” he said. His breath was hot on her chest and it tickled her. The heat pooled between her legs. The longing was no longer bearable. His hands caressed her so softly that her body trobbed with anticipated pleasure.

“I, ahh,” she mumbled, “I was thinking… be honest, Alan. How many women have you been with like this?”

His caresses abruptly stopped. Alan, perplexed, looked up at her. “What?” he asked, “What are you talking about?”

“Don’t play dumb,” said Saina, “How many?”

“Only you, Sia,” he said.

“Really?” she asked, “You can tell me, you know.”

“I will swear by it if you want me to,” he said, “Why were you suddenly thinking about that? Do I look like I would have done it with anyone else except you?”

“No, I was just…,” Siana trailed off.

“Tell me,” he said.

“It’s just that you are so…,” mumbled Siana.

“What?” he asked.

Siana chewed at her lips debating whether she should tell him. “You are so good at this,” she blurted out, “I am so inexperienced at it because I have never done it before. I was so clumsy when I was kissing you earlier. But it comes to you naturally. Am I really your first?”

Just as well, thought Siana, I blurted it all out. Better than thinking about it every time I am with him. Siana decided that it was better to clear out everything right now than to live doubting each other.

The silence stretched so long that Siana looked at Alan. She had thought he might be embarrassed with the question or maybe a little angry but his lips were twitching as though he was having a hard time holding back his laugh.

Siana was so embarrassed she tried turning away but Alan pulled her closer and embraced her. He mumbled, his face buried in her neck. “You really drive me crazy,” he said. He sounded as though he was smiling.

Siana was so offended. “You are laughing at me again,” she said as she tried to wriggle out of his arms.

Siana didn’t care about his past lovers. It wasn’t like they had been together for long, and their marriage had been so sudden. Besides, his past was none of her business. But she felt it was so unfair that she was so clumsy at this while he knew what he was doing. It made her feel so miserable to compare herself to his past lovers who undoubtedly knew what they were doing as well.

Siana looked at him and he was smiling again. She wanted answers and all he did was sit there and smirk. Siana didn’t know how to react to this. Alan chuckled and buried his face in her neck again.

“Sia…,” he said, “I never thought I would hear those words from your lips. How the hell do you manage to think of something like that?”

“It’s obvious, isn’t it?” she said, “You are skilled at this. Not like me. It seems obvious that you have had tons of practice. Tell me, Alan. It’s alright. Just the truth.”

“There is only you,” he said, “There has always been only you. You are my first, Sia.”

Since he said it so seriously and directly, she knew it was the truth but it still seemed so unbelievable. “Then how are you so good at this?” he asked.

Siana had never had any experience with things like this. Alan knew where to touch her to make her squirm. No matter how I look at it, it doesn’t seem like Alan is completely new to this.

“I just use my instincts,” said Alan, at her neck. His breath tickled her. “Did it really make you feel like I was a pro at this?”

“That’s ridiculous,” said Siana, “How can someone be this good just by using instincts if they haven’t done it before?”

“I guess I am a natural at it then,” said Alan as he caressed her waist and kissed her again. He lowered his head to her breasts and kissed her there. Everytime his tongue licked her nipple, she jerked in pleasure.

If she were Alan, she wouldn’t know a woman’s anatomy so well, let alone the points on her chest which made her squirm. She would be too stumped seeing a woman’s body for the first time. She had felt frozen when she had seen Alan naked the first time. She still couldn’t believe that she was his first.

As Alan kissed her chest, she tried to restrain herself and glared at him. Alan let out a sigh. “Alright,” he said, “I will tell you. There has been no one else before you and no one after you. You can trust me on that.” Siana was skeptical about it but she wanted to hear what he was going to say.

“As for being skilled,” he said, “It’s from things heard and seen.”

Siana raised an eyebrow. “Heard and seen?”

“Well, in a barrack, you don’t get much privacy,” he said, “All sorts of guys are with you. Young and old. So they talk.”

“So they talk about their lovers… like Yulia?” she asked.

“Yes,” he said, “They would talk about their lovers and what they did with them. All… sorts of things. We didn’t have much privacy, as I said. We were all on guard together, and I heard things from them. I couldn’t very well just ignore them and go away. They never stop talking. But little did I know that it would be so useful to me in the future.” He directed her a smirk. “If I had known, I would have listened more attentively.”

Siana blushed. He planted a kiss on her lips. “I think I should be grateful to you that you like it so much,” he added. “Remember the time when you said you don’t like rabbits?”

Siana blushed harder. “Why are you bringing that up, all of a sudden?” she asked, aghast.

Alan laughed. “You rejected my proposal because of that,” he said, “I thought if you knew that I had never done it before, you would just leave me.”


“You brought up the rabbit thing, so I thought you were experienced in this. I, too, pretended to be bold because I was afraid you would throw me out in a heartbeat. I didn’t want to let you know I was inexperienced.”

Siana was so taken aback that she looked at Alan with eyes full of confusion.



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